Life Boat

It almost seems inevitable: the judgments, comparisons, and criticisms that fill each of our days, each of our hours, each of our minutes, down to every second. Sometimes we don't even realize that we're doing it-- we have programmed ourselves to do it so much. It drains our energy and tires us, leaving us exhausted as well as ashamed.

Humans have always been concerned about who is stronger, who is faster, who is smarter, who is prettier, who is better. Our society has centered around comparison, causing us to strive to be the best. In our minds, our worth is solely dependent upon our place in the line of accomplishments, success, and status. We base ourselves off of other people. We create our identity by analyzing the abilities of others.

We blame ourselves, we give ourselves guilt over the things that we are not guilty of. We never expect others to be the person that we expect ourselves to be. Thus, we set ourselves up for a painful struggle in our mind. So often, we find that we don't feel like we suffice. That we are not good enough: simply because we are not the BEST at ____ whatever that may be.

You've probably heard this analogy before: If we were all in a lifeboat and supplies were running low, we would ask ourselves "who on this boat is the most worthy?" or "who is best? who deserves to survive?" What if we set aside our comparisons? What if we accepted ourselves? What would it mean if we were to realize the truth: God does not love us for our qualities. God accepts us. God loves us. Our worth has nothing to do with how beautiful, smart, or impressive we are. Our worth comes from God- He has shown us that and He has promised us that. He loves us. When we allow Him to accept us as He actually has already done, we will realize that nothing and nobody defines us besides God.

Fear

Fear: transitive verb

1: to feel fear in (oneself)
2: to have a reverential awe of <fear God>
3: to be afraid of : expect with alarm <fear the worst>
intransitive verb: to be afraid or apprehensive <feared for their lives>

Fear: noun
1: a distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined; the feeling or condition of being afraid. 2: a specific instance of or propensity for such a feeling: an abnormal fear of heights.
3: concern or anxiety; solicitude: a fear for someone's safety.
4: reverential awe, esp. toward God. 5: that which causes a feeling of being afraid; that of which a person is afraid: Cancer is a common fear.

A few months ago, one of my friends told me that there are only two motivators of our actions: fear and love. When she first said it, I brushed it off. After all, I thought, if I was to truly accept myself and allow myself to be accepted by others and God, I will never achieve to be the way that I want to be. This is a very common fear about acceptance and love. People believe that if they love themselves, they will not change for the better or they'll "allow themselves to slide".

"The acceptance of self does not mean to be resigned to the status quo. On the contrary, the more fully we accept ourselves, the more successfully we begin to grow. Love is a far better stimulus than threat or pressure" (From The Ragamuffin Gospel by Brennan Manning)

Fear fosters negative emotions like guilt, shame, depression, anger, anxiety, and eventually hopelessness. These emotions, in turn, will eventually turn you away from the life you want to live. When we actually accept ourselves, we stop being so concerned with being powerful or popular. We realize that we don't need to please others because we begin to appreciate life and love ourselves, therefore allowing us to move through peace.

"In love, there is no room for fear, but perfect love drives out fear, because fear implies punishment and no one who is afraid has come to perfection in love" ~1 John 4:18

It is only when we accept that we are truly powerless and that we need not expect ourselves to live up to unreachable standards that we can be made into something beautiful through God. Even though we think that we have to be punished for not achieving or threatened into achieving, it is actually quite the opposite. Once all of that is abandoned, God can work in us, bringing us up into a life that is much more full and much more real. If we can just trust God, we will be able to do so much more than a life lived in fear.

"If the blind puth their hand in God's, they find their way more surely than those who see but have not faith nor purpose."
~Helen Keller

I suppose that we will have to allow ourselves to be blinded until God can bring us to a spot of peace, a place where our fears no longer haunt us, and a place where we are finally able to trust.